How much she hath glorified herself, and lived deliciously, so much torment and sorrow give her: for she saith in her heart, I sit a queen, and am no widow, and shall see no sorrow.
—Revelation 18:7
5494 License Plate No. 1
Paul Powell, Illinois secretary of state, had to decide who would get auto license plate No. 1. “It was a real problem,” he said. “I’m not about to assign it to someone and make about a thousand other people feel hurt.” His solution? He assigned it to himself.
5495 Strong Dose Of Selfishness Okayed
Merv Anderson, reviewing Dr. Hans Selve’s book, Stress Without Distress, states that the Montreal doctor prescribes “a strong dose of selfishness as the best way of achieving a happier, saner society.” Unbridled idealism, he suggests, is a cancerous curse. He even dares to attack one of the Bible’s most celebrated injunctions: “Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.” He brands this as biological heresy.
Dr. Selve asserts that true self-interest covers the full range of biological drives, and this includes man’s social nature and his need to get along with other people.
His solution—altruistic egotism. This is simply a case of helping others for the selfish motive of deserving help in return.
So instead of trying the impossible feat of loving your neighbor as yourself, you should content yourself with earning your neighbor’s respect.
5496 Only Interests For France
“We do not have friends; we have interests,” said General Charles De Gaulle while President of France. What did he mean? Simply that France’s relationships with other nations could only be decided around her “interests”—commercial advantage or disadvantage. This is the underlying common denominator which determines most national relationships and decisions in Commerce.
5497 “Just You And Me”
Dear Friend:
Our church membership 1400
Nonresident membership 75
Balance left to do the work… 1325
Elderly folks who have done their share in the past 25
Balance left to do the work… 1300
Sick and shut-in folks 25
Balance left to do the work… 1275
Membership who did not pledge 350
Christmas and Easter members 300
Balance left to do the work… 625
Members who are too tired and overworked 300
Balance left to do the work… 325
Alibiers 200
Balance left to do the work… 125
Members who are too busy somewhere else 123
Balance left to do the work… 2
Just you and me—and brother, you’d better get busy, for it’s too much for me!
—Progress
5498 When Other Fellow Acts …
Have you noticed: WHEN the other fellow acts that way, he is ugly; when you do, it’s nerves. WHEN others are set in their ways, they’re obstinate; when you are, it is firmness. WHEN your neighbor doesn’t like your friend, he’s prejudiced; when you don’t like his, you are a good judge of human nature. WHEN he tries to treat someone especially well, he’s toadying; when you try it, you are being thoughtful.
WHEN he takes time to do things well, he’s a slowpoke or lazy; when you do, you are deliberate and careful. WHEN he spends a lot, he is a spendthrift; when you do, you’re generous. WHEN someone picks flaws in things, he’s cranky and critical; when you do, you are creative. WHEN he is mild-mannered you call him weak; when you are, it is graciousness.
WHEN someone dresses especially well, that person is extravagant; when you do, it is tastefulness. WHEN he says what he thinks, he’s spiteful; when you do, you are being frank. WHEN he takes great risks in business, he’s foolhardy; when you do, you are wise financier.
5499 Pink Was Empress’ Property
The Russian empress Elizabeth Petrovna, daughter of Peter the Great, had a strange liking for the shade of pink. She was so jealous of this tint that she issued a decree making it a capital crime for any other woman in her empire to wear a pink garment—visible or concealed. The empress prided herself on being an opponent of capital punishment. But any woman caught in a violation of the pink law was liable to mutilation or deportation to Siberia—or both.
5500 Sin In Psychology
Some 7,000 psychologists jammed into Cincinnati for their annual convention. The University of Illinois’ famed researcher O. Hobart Mowrer—how famed, the reader can presently determine for himself—declared, “We psychologists have largely followed the Freudian doctrine that human beings are too good.” The patient “has within him impulses, especially those of lust and hostility which he has been unnecessarily inhibiting. And health, we tell him, lies in recognizing and expressing these impulses … As a result, we have largely abandoned belief in right and wrong, virtue and sin.”
—Prairie Overcomer
5501 Roosevelt’s Drive
Theodore Roosevelt, sometimes known as Roosevelt the First, was a President who knew his value; he did not cheapen himself by underestimating it. “Father always had to be the center of attention,” said one of his children. “When he went to a wedding, he wanted to be the bride. When he went to a funeral, he was sorry that he couldn’t be the corpse.”
5502 Horseback Logic
A small boy and his sister were riding on the back of the new wooden horse given to them as a present. Suddenly the boy turned to his sister and said: “If one of us would get off there would be more room for me.”
5503 “Talking About Me”
Elizabeth Chevalier, author of the best-selling novel, Driven Woman, wrote in a letter to Macmillan, “Have you heard the one about the novelist who met an old friend? After they had talked for two hours, the novelist said, “Now we’ve talked about me long enough—let’s talk about you! What did you think of my last novel?””
5504 Book Hunt For Own Name
It is said that Dr. Clyde Miller of Columbia University has his way of disposing of dull books occasionally sent to him by publishers. He sends them on to friends with a note, ostensibly from the author, saying, I hope you will be pleased by the references made to you in this volume, and hope that you will not have any objection to this use of your name.” Dr. Miller takes pleasure in the vision of friends searching vainly through the books for allusions to them.
5505 Her New Snowsuit
A Milwaukee teacher took her first-grade class to a dairy where a guide showed the children through the entire plant, explaining the whole process. The tour over, the guide asked if anyone had any questions. One little girl raised her hand.
“Did you notice,” she asked, “that I’ve got on my new snowsuit?”
—Milwaukee Journal
5506 Narcissus In Love With Self
One day, Narcissus, who had resisted all the charms of others, came to an open fountain of silvery clearness. He stooped down to drink, and saw his own image, and thought it some beautiful water-spirit living in the fountain. He gazed, and admired the eyes, the neck, the hair, the lips. He fell in love with himself. In vain he sought a kiss and an embrace. He talked to the charmer, but received no response. He could not break the fascination, and so he pined away and died.
—Foster
5507 Politicians’ Assumed Meanings
When a political columnist says “every thinking man,” he means himself. When a candidate appeals to “every intelligent voter,” he means everybody who’s going to vote for him.
5508 Names On The Bullets
When the Athenians, after a battle with Xerxes came to the Isthmus, and every officer took a bullet from the altar to inscribe upon it the names of those who had done the best service, every one put himself in the first place, and Themistocles in the second.
—Plutarch
5509 Epigram On Self-Centeredness
• “Be Yourself!” is about the worse advice you can give to some people.
• My idea of an agreeable person is one who agrees with me.
—Samuel Johnson
• Admiration: Our polite recognition of another person’s resemblance to ourselves.
• Some people have a keen sense of humor. The more you humor them, the better they like it.
• You can always tell when a man’s well-informed. His views are pretty much like your own.
—Louie Morris
• For an impenetrable shield, stand inside yourself.
—Thoreau
• Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.
—Lord Chesterfield
• He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals.
—Franklin
• Talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours.
—Disraeli
• He who thinks himself good for everything is often good for nothing.
—Picard
• The smallest package we have ever seen is a man wrapped up in himself.
• The husband who boasts that he never made a mistake has a wife who did.
• In the post office of a prideful small town in New York State, appropriate signs were posted over the outgoing-mail slots. One sign read “Webster,” the town’s name; the other read “Rest of the World.”
See also: Individualism ; Conceited ; Proud ; II Tim. 3:2.